Using secret sounds of names as a predictor
of personality. By David Hocking
Like a tiny piece of personalised music,
each of us has a name that, like all sounds, evokes some small and
subconscious response from those we meet. This collective reaction,
over the years of our existence, can gently trickle down and influence
whom we become.
This book is a must-read if you are faced with one of the following
scenarios.....
- You’ve either fallen pregnant – or
knocked-up your girlfriend – and are trying desperately to arrive at a
baby name that won’t destroy the child’s life.
- You work with an idiot and you wonder how
they became an idiot.
- Your parents didn’t have access to this
book and they mysteriously called you Nigel, Colleen, Sharon or
Kingston. And you wonder why people seem to treat you differently.
THE STORY SO FAR....
Seven years ago, Hocking visited a friend
for coffee and from out of the blue - and with an excited smile on her
face from something that happened the night before - she asked him, “So
what do you think of the name Murray?”
Continuing the joke, David ran the name
through his head a few times and a picture suddenly appeared in his
mind. And thus, the first name theory was born.....
Murray:
The name given to the phenomenon of dropping a bucket that is
half-filled with mud. After it hits the ground most of it slops
straight up and hits you in the face as you stand there. “Oh Murray!”
you cry. He’s tolerated in the country, indeed he’s very funny, but
city folk just don’t understand him.
The joke then grew from Murray to Patrick, to Andrew, to Malcolm, and
spread to hundreds of names, because it was funny - and because it
often seemed to be uncannily true. After a time, Hocking realized that
names are just like miniature star signs.....and now there’s a guide
with around 2000 names on the list. Here are some examples.....
Kylie: The Dignified Bogan.
Jake: Jake has more
pornography in his bedroom than any other male. He was once caught
masturbating by his mother who burst into his room to find him standing
over an upturned TV with his trousers around his ankles and with Jake
the Snake in his hand. He didn’t return to the house for days and, yes,
he did eventually move out. He now wears a flannel shirt.
Jodie: The gorgeous looking
feral cat who is dangerous only when cornered or un-fed.
Ken: Ken rhymes with brick.
Libby: Bipolar. Be careful.
Hunter: Delusional.
Natalie: The Swiss Army
knife that’s ready to stab, cut, unscrew, slice, grip, open, scale,
magnify and abrade anything that needs it. Unfortunately, she has so
many functions that she sometimes forgets what to use when. The last
time I saw her she was trying to cut through a wire fence with a
screwdriver.
.....but it’s not all bad, and this is but
the tip of the iceberg!
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